Archive for the ‘Thoughts’ Category

It’s been one of those days.  I have them more frequently now than before.  I don’t know why, I just feel discombobulated or something similar.  I did accomplish all I set out to do this week for a change.  Maybe that’s it…I finally have everything done for now.

If you read my book blog, you know that I’ve posted 6 or 7 reviews this week and that took a lot off my mind.  That doesn’t mean that I read all those books this week, though.  Sometimes I put off writing the reviews if I can’t think of anything to say about the book or the author.  I usually like the books I read, but sometimes there is a clinker.  I have had requests from authors to review their books, but have had to decline because I have such a stack to finish.  I may not live long enough to do that.

I gave the house a lick and a promise this week because we really did clean well last week.  That took a load off.  I can’t stand to have the sun shine in the windows and see the dust accumulated on the hardwood floor, nor can I stand the detritus that attacks the counters and floors and bathroom fixtures in between cleanings.  I try not to look, but then I stick to the floor and it’s all over.

I love to crochet and decided that I would try something new….a sweater!  I was so diligent…I measured, counted stitches, blocked the pieces, sewed them together with a very fine seam, or so I thought.  When I finished sewing in the sleeves and adding the trim, I found that the only person who could wear the thing would have to have the body of an orangutan.  The sleeves just weren’t the right length for the sweater.  I think I’ll try a poncho next.  If that doesn’t work, it’s back to hats, and blankets.

The dog received a bath this morning…he hates them, but I was ready for him.  I wore some old jeans, an old knit top and my old slippers ( I should have forgone the bra and undies too), and turned on the garage sink.  As soon as I dumped the little devil in the sink and soaked him down, he tried to climb up my head.  I got as wet as he did, although he got cleaner.   The clothes line in the garage is draped with my duds.  That’s why I have doggie cologne to use when he needs a bath.  I get to put if off until I am forced to take action.

This is the first entry I have written for my blog in quite a while.  I usually can think of great things to write about just as I am falling asleep in my comfortable bed and I am not about to get up to write.  I should though,  some of my somnolent thoughts are the best.  In the morning I don’t remember diddly, of course that continues all day.  I can’t remember anything…my kids’ names, did-I-take-my-pills, why-am-I-in-this-room…that sort of things.  What makes it worse is my husband can’t remember either.  We spend our days just wondering – who? what? where? when?  It’s hell to get old.




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I have been extremely remiss in posting to this blog.  I think it’s because I don’t know how to approach what I want to say.  It’s easy to write when the mood is good and thoughts flow more freely then.  I’m not sure what is going on with me at this point, but I have had this lost feeling for a few months now.  Perhaps it is because for the past five and a half years, I have been seeing doctors constantly.  Sometimes more than two appointments in a week…every since I was diagnosed with alopecia in June of 2010 and breast cancer in July of 2010.  It’s been a whirlwind of activity, even more so after retiring in June of 2013.  I’m not sure why that is.  Perhaps Rich and I are taking on more activities, but I really don’t think that’s the case.  I almost feel useless or something.  Oh, hey, I have TONS of projects that my house is calling me to do…wash windows, paint the kitchen, dining room, bathrooms, den and master bedroom, deep clean each and every room, stuff that I need to do, but not stuff I really want to spend my time doing.  I do spend time reading and writing reviews, crocheting baby afghans, piecing and quilting baby quilts.  Plus, I have SO many other projects that I’d like to accomplish before I storm the pearly gates, that I will probably have to will them to my kids and grandkids.  It would be interesting to see if they can get them done in a timely fashion.

I think that it’s finally sunk in that I no longer have a daily job…no one is expecting me to come in to work…no job is critical for me to finish.  Also, I am not in contact with that many people in a week.  I think I miss the comaradarie with so many people that I enjoyed in my job.  I sometimes feel as though I have lost my purpose in life.  I guess that’s to be expected at this stage in the game.  I guess I’ll just have to feel fulfilled making sure the house is clean, the bed is fresh, the meals are cooked and whatever else I can think of.

I really need to focus on what is right with my life.  I’m healthy, well…for the most part.  I have a great husband, great kids, their spouses, and beautiful grandchildren.  My Mom is still here and healthy, my extended family is doing well.  Actually, I have very little to complain about.  I just need to get my head on straight and remember that it’s the little things that mean a lot.

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Amy Drown

Writer, Editor & Photographer

Life...In My Own Words

Reflections of a PITA (Pain in the What?)

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